9 Reasons Why You Are Still Single!

Have you ever wondered or asked yourself questions like, why am I single? Am I that bad? Does no one feel anything for me, Can I still fall in love?…

There are so many reasons why most people have remained single all these while. Some are comfortable with their single status, while some are really sad about it.

Below, are some reasons stated by the creative writer, CHIZZY.

Unrealistic Standards And High Expectations

In finding a companion, soulmate or lover we all have our distinctive standards set aside, for example, I’m sapiosexual(attracted to intelligent women) for me it’s not just about the beauty you’ve got to have brains too. It might be how he or she should look, smell, speak, walk, act or where they’re from, whether an Italian, British or African. However, oftentimes we tend to set unrealistic standards that are almost impossible or very rare to achieve.

For example, this is actually a true story: a female friend of mine once said she will like to marry or date a Korean guy in an Igbo(a tribe in Nigeria) man’s body, hilarious right? This is because she likes how cute and romantic Korean guys are and likes how Igbo men are tall, treats and cares for their women, but the reality is you can only have one and if you want to have both you will have to wait for ages for a Korean-Igbo man(half-cast) to come your way.

You keep setting high expectations and the funny thing is most of these people that set these high expectations have little or nothing to offer, you want a tall-handsome-dark-rich-man but you can’t cook, and this man you want is looking for a tall-pretty-curvy-melanin woman who can cook but you don’t possess these things. You want a high-class pretty lady but you don’t have the financial capability to take care of her, this is definitely one of the reasons why you’re still single.

Capability

Are you capable? A lot of people are still single because they are not capable or ready for the drama that comes with dating a person. Are you capable financially? emotionally? sexually? physically? mentally? Are you ready to make sacrifices, cut off some friends for him/her, take a leave and stay back home because he is sick, skip classes in her favour, sacrifice your time, energy, money and render services?.

Logically and practically speaking, being in a relationship requires and costs a lot but when you’re deeply in love it doesn’t cost a dime because everything you do, you do it willingly and out of love without the other person even asking. Why you’re still single is because you’re not ready for the stress, sacrifice, time, energy, money, commitment and dedication that comes with being in a relationship.

Availability

Are you available emotionally? mentally? financially? sexually? and physically?……… The reason why you’re still single is that you’re carrying baggage from past relationships(you’re not available). Just because you were hurt in your past relationship you have concluded that “all men are scum” and “all women are harlots” and because of this, you have decided to stay single(emotionally unavailable).

You can’t be hooking up with married men and be available for a serious relationship, you can’t always be too busy with work and be available, you can’t always lock up yourself at home looking so unkempt, bushy, dirty and be available(physically unavailable).

Like I said earlier sometimes you do most of these things without even realizing that they’re the reasons why you’re still single because they have become part of you. So hey forget about the past, move on, dress up and go out, create an avenue to meet new people, and be available for new friendships that might lead to a relationship or not.

Accessibility

People are different and unique in their own ways but sometimes one needs to loosen up and get out of their comfort zone. Are you accessible? or you keep telling people I’m an introvert, I’m antisocial, I don’t like going out, I like my life private, I don’t like people, I don’t like parties, the list goes on.

On social media, you have private accounts, nobody can access your pictures or videos, you’ve blocked half of your contacts on WhatsApp, and you don’t post, memes, trends, funny videos(someone might like your sense of humour), post your pictures on your status or Instagram story, you don’t want to chat with any guy that enters your DM(at least hear him out) but you’re quick to admire lovers when you see one “awwn you both look so cute together” LOL(laugh-out-loud).

If you’re not accessible how do you want people to see you, meet you, and connect with you? If you don’t go out how will you meet that type of girl or guy you want? Fine, you’re not the social type but once in a while be one, stop being too serious every damn time life is not that serious you know, be free, have fun, live life, dance, smile more, laugh out loud, play and most importantly love.

Be Approachable

Are you approachable? You’re a lady and you’re quickly irritated by every guy that approaches you whether they had any intention of wooing you or just asking for directions, a man is trying to approach you but you’re too egocentric to even listen to what he has to say, even if you’re not feeling him there are ways to get rid of him you don’t always have to give a nasty attitude, calm down girl, smile, be polite, you might never know where it leads….

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Written by: CHIZZY Follow us on Instagram @sofovilla | Follow us on Twitter @sofovilla | Like our page on Facebook via @sofovillamedia